Your Body Image is how you psychologically relate to or view your body. To know whether you have a positive or a negative body image, you can try to describe your body in 5 words. Generally, it is common to have a negative body image which is merely associated with aesthetics. And surprisingly, when asked to rate yourselves on intelligence, you may freely give yourself a 5 out of 5. But, when asked to rate yourself based on your appearance, you feel clueless.
This is primarily to do with the kind of emotions you associate with your body. I believe, it is at this point, that a wrong emotion is triggered. Instead of shame, it is a concern that should be triggered. You isn’t your fault if you’re not the ideal weight. It isn’t something to be shameful about. If anything, you can be concerned and do something towards it. Working out and controlling your diet with concern is a more adaptive approach as it makes you compassionate towards your body. It also helps you sustain on the right path, rather than succumbing to diet hacks, and inconsistent tormenting workout sessions for shortcut results.
This is no way suggests that you passively accept and not do anything about being unfit, instead, it’s important to accept yourself and your body so you can work towards a healthier version without feelings of guilt, shame, or embarrassment. In short, you must work on your body because you love yourself and wish to strive for a fitter self, not because you hate your body and are desperate to change it.
Let’s take an example of a friend for a better understanding; If your friend gains weight, would you feel shameful or concerned? I believe most of you would feel concerned. Likewise, you have to feel that compassion for yourself. If you allow your friend to lose weight at their own pace, and encourage them in the process without any hate comments or punishments, then why be so critical and harsh with yourself? Rather love and maintain your body just like you do with your internal organs such as teeth, tongue, and your mouth. You don’t get obsessed over them, spend the whole day, or all your money on it. Then why obsess over your external body?
One of the prime cause of such self-critical behaviour is social media. Everyone puts their best foot forward on portals like Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat, and Twitter. It is, therefore, important to choose the account you follow wisely. Follow accounts that educate you, teach you some new skills, and not just accounts that focus on advocating external beauty and perfect bodies. It’s okay if you have to unfollow a few accounts that make you feel inferior because you don’t fit a specific body shape.
It’s disheartening to see that social media portals have reduced to encourage a fitness culture where only specific appearances and body shapes are appreciated. Indeed, your body matters, however, your body shape and size aren’t the only thing that matters. Imagine looking at Bill Gates and Mother Terresa, would you ever focus on their outward appearances over the magnanimity of work they’ve done. Or let’s look at your favourite actor or cricketer, for example, would you still adore them if they lacked their acting skills or the skill to perform well? I doubt. This makes it crystal clear that we are all known by our work more than by our external appearances.
In contrast to the generally held belief that woman alone are subject to body shaming, both men and women experience it. Usually, kids who are bullied for being over-weight, skinny, bulky, dark, etc learn to develop a critical view of themselves and their body as they grow up. They become adults who lack self-confidence and are low on self-esteem. It is then, the responsibility of grown-ups to be cautious of the words they use with children as they can leave a lasting impact on their development.
To summarise, don’t bet all your marbles on outward appearance. Focus on the whole being in its entirety. Look at the person behind that body, their skills, and the way they treat you. Looking after one’s body is good but obsessing over just one element of it will do you no good.
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